The Anatomy of a Bad Link Exchange Email

by Matthew Diehl on August 11, 2010

Link exchange emails happen, there is no way to avoid them [besides not having email]. However, the frequency that these emails now arrive is drastically less and the “people” sending them just haven’t clued in on that this method has gone the way of Google Wave [ouch, too soon?]. In recent years, SEOs have proven that the real ticket to PageRank boosting links are unidirectional inbound links so they focus on building content, building relationships and buying [gasp! I know! Anyways…].

So, when I got the latest email looking to exchange links with me I could not pass up the opportunity to analyze it because, honesty, it was BAD.

Here is the email in it’s entirety:

Let’s break it down…

Jedi Mind Tricks
Alright, Moshin, you are probably a cool dude (or dudette) but Jedi Mind Tricks don’t actually work in real life, only in cinematography. Your email address ( and name (linktomoshin) will not subliminally influence me in anyway shape or form. I am not the link exchange partner you are looking for.
Tip for Moshin: Make it more personal and at least share the same domain in your email as the site you are building links for. Moshin.[insert last name] is a much better email address to use.

I am a Sir
Moshin, Moshin, Moshin… Salutation FAIL! Was I not clear in defining that I am a guy [see photo in right hand column, yes it appears on the contact page too]. I know, I COULD be the bearded lady at the carnival freak show so you may want to be cautious not to hurt my feelings but I am a man [the man that you wish your man could SEO like].
Tip of Moshin: Open your eyes, a little thought and research never hurts when it comes to trying to connect with someone for link building. Again, make it personal and it may work [60% of the time it works every time, which… makes no sense].

Yay! I’m Excited Too!
Wait, no I’m not and you, Moshin, are too easily excitable. I think you need to get out more. I must, however, commend you on your first attempt at adding any touch of personal to this request. Good effort tiger but it falls apart quickly into a downward spiral of poor grammar and messaging. It is difficult to think that this method ever works.
Tip for Moshin: Keep it professional personal. Try and build a relationship with me, I like to be swooned a little before I go about linking to people all willy nilly.

It’s a Threefer!
[No, not reefer, potheads…] It’s an exchange 1 get 3 in return deal, how great for me! Until I realize where you are offering me links from, off target [which may/may not matter] domains that are already littered with links to more off target sites. That is a community that I am not interested in joining, thanks but no thanks.
Tip for Moshin: Offer something of value, I could potentially be giving you an on topic link so it only makes sense to offer something of similar QUALITY (not quantity).

The End
Not too shabby in the wrap up until, and I quote:

Always Keep Smiling !!!!!!
` •.¸ (¨`•.•´¨) ~
(¨`•.•´¨) ¸.•´ -`-~

[insert shocked face]……….. [pfftt hahahahaha….]
Tip for Moshin: Get rid of that, now! Seriously, how am I supposed to take you seriously. I know I said be personal, be personal, be personal but you took it too far, pull back just a bit.

Well, there you have it the anatomy of a bad link exchange email. What else do you have for Moshin?

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